My 13 hour CHL class
According to law, the Texas CHL class must meet for 10 hours of classroom time. Official start time for this past Saturday’s class was 8 am, and the class was held in Lockhart, so I was up at 5 a.m. and on the road, fueled up, Dunkies in hand by 7:00. Class let out 15 hours later,at 9:30 pm – 5 hours over time. We might’ve gotten out on time if the classroom hadn’t been such a boys club – more on that later. But since I’m sure you desperately want to know how it went overall, I’ll serve up the desert first, and the savory details after:
Shoothouse Barbie can concealed carry! I shot a 241 out of 250 (over 95%, passing is at least 70%) on the shoot test, which, considering that I was tired, starving, had the worst blood sugar deficiency headache, and the sun had completely set by the time it was my turn, is pretty darn good. I wonder how much more precise I would’ve been if the class wasn’t interrupted every time some jackass felt the need to wave his balls around; I might’ve been able to see my groupings.
Now for the savory details…
I took the class at Shaefer Academy, in Lockhart. Tom Shaefer was the instructor. I specifically chose this class because Tom is a retired APD Sargeant who has both courtroom experience and experience getting shot at. He has never been shot, though, nor has he ever had to shoot someone in the 30 years as an officer of the law.
I wore my Red Sox hat, jeans and a black crew cut tank top – I don’t have bountiful assets so there’s no gap to allow hot brass to fall down the front of my shirt. I had planned to wear the Blackhawk Rescue Repellar belt that Marc gave me, which is a good holter belt that is very wide and comfy, and also looks absolutely badass. I figured that I’d be able to hold my own in the class regardless, but the belt definately screams ‘don’t f*** with me’. Alas, in my 5 a.m. haze, I forgot to grab it.
I arrived bright and early at the academy, which is on Tom’s ranch. The first thing I saw was Tom and 2 guys, who I later found out were Marine Recruits, and about 3 farm dogs. I love farm dogs! They are the sweetest, happiest, and for the most part, calmest dogs you will ever find, because they get to run around outside all day. The dogs had been abandoned by their previous owners and simply wandered up and were taken in, and decided to stay. Coco and Noel were my favorites, they were just loving all over everyone.
The first thing that Tom asked me after introducing himself and asking my name was if I had brought some kind of support system with me.
“What, like a belt,” I asked, silently cursing my prior forgetfulness.
“I mean a husband or boyfriend with you.”
“No,” I said laughingly. Sometimes I forget that I’m in Texas. “My boyfriend got me into shooting. But he lives in Arizona, and I live by myself, hence one of the reasons I want my CHL.”
Tom then told me that there would be 2 other girls in the class, and I assured him that I could hold my own with the boys. Overall there were 16 of us, total.
We started off with paperwork and fingerprints. After the prints, we were instructed on how to wash the special ink off our fingers with the special print-ink soap. After I’d had my prints taken, I noticed that, perhaps coincidentally but certainly reeking of irony, the label on the soap bottle was in spanish.
Tom told us how much he hated the finger print part of the class, because the prints have to be precisely roled onto paper in such a way that all the lines are shown, though said it was much easier with us than back when he was working a cop, because CHL students tend not to spit and bite and kick you while you’re trying to get their prints.
“Sometimes,” he said, “it would take 20 minutes to get one print of a guy, and then the other five guys at the station would decide that one was enough and we’d get the rest later. And I’d say, ‘why the heck did you wait so long, then?’ And they’d say,’you know how boring it gets around here – that was our only entertainment!’”
Class was finally underway after that. Those who have a concealed carry permit already know the majority of what the class covers, but for those who don’t know, a significant portion of the class covers non-violent dispute resolution and conceptual exercise aimed to teach you that it is not always in your best interest to shoot someone, even when the use of lethal force is justified. A common misconception amongst gun-haters is that carrying a gun is about having a bigger penis than the other guy, that it is about using a firearm to take the law into your own hands, or play god, or to beat the other guy into submission. (And now I have put “penis” and “submission” in the same sentence. Can’t wait to see what kinds of google hits this turns up). This is not so. If you think that carrying a gun means it’s ok to waive it around or to pull it out anytime someone says or does something rude or distasteful, you should not carry a gun. The first thing covered is that you should carry a gun because you have the right not to made a victim, and to protect yourself from others who would victimize you and your loved ones (and in some cases, neighbors). So, when should you pull a gun? The answer, quite simply, is the same as it is in the essential rules of the range: only point a gun at something you intend to destroy.
The repurcussions for pulling a gun and not shooting are inumerable, and none of them good. For example, you catch someone in your house and you pull the gun on them but don’t shoot. Instead, you say ’stop what you are doing and leave, and don’t come near me.’ What if the listen, what if they turn around and say ok. Now you have a gun pointed at them. You still have the right to shoot them if you choose, and you probably should. If you tell them to get out and they say no, shoot them, and do it quickly. The last thing you want to get into is a conversation. If they can get you talking, your reaction time is going to slow down by a quarter of a second, which is very significant in close quarters.
But what if they beg for sympathy? What if they say, “please don’t hurt me, I just need food for my kids.” This situation is commonly why many people object to legal use of firearms as lethal force in the home. ‘Oh it is such a trajedy, he didn’t want to hurt anyone, he wasn’t even armed’ Yes, it is a trajedy that some people end up getting shot and dying for such a stupid thing as unarmed burgulary. But, in my oppinion, and I’m sure others agree, it is a far bigger trajedy that some people think it is ok to victimize others. Even theft is victimization. Whether you agree that it is ok to shoot and kill someone for stealing from you in your home, you should recognize that this is not a concept that was born after the appearance of guns in society. The Torah, Bible, and Koran all say that it is ok to kill a thief in your home.
A crucial part of the defensive mindset taught in the CHL class was DO NOT EMPATHIZE WITH A VICTIMIZER. What if he really is robbing you because his kids are starving, or if he has no intention to harm you?
“Don’t care,” says Tom, because it still does not make it ok for him to victimize you.
“Not to mention, anyone who says they’re only looking for money to buy food is blatantly lying. There are soup kitchens and shelters, and these guys could get welfare from the government.”
Shit, they could probabably even get their own house from the government!
In your house, as opposed to when carrying concealed in public, a reasonable threat to your iminent safety is assumed, thus it is not necessary to prove that a threat existed and that you are in iminent danger, and, according to castle doctrine, you do not have to try to retreat from the threat.
Here’s where the asshats started chiming in…
“So, does that mean I can shoot a guy if I catch him climbing out of my window with my plasma screen TV?”
Idgit. Technically yes, was the answer, but that might not be something you want to do. Even if you have the right to shoot, and the guy is indeed a goblin, there are long lasting psychological consequences to killing another person. Not to mention, if he’s already half-way out your window with your TV, shooting him will probably be more costly in terms of legal fees than the cost of your TV, which insurance will probably cover. If it were me, I wouldn’t shoot him…unless he tried to come back inside.
The home is one case where there is a significant likelihood that you won’t be charged for shooting an intruder, but the situation is much different when it comes to concealed carry. If you shoot someone in public, even if you have the right to do so, you will be probably detained and charged. In all cases, if you are charged, you must appear before the grand jury and convince them of the following clauses:
1. A reasonable threat existed. A reasonable threat means something that causes a response of reasonable fear, which is claus 2. Distasteful and offensive language does not constitute a reasonable threat, so that guy who is being a douchbag and saying mean things about your mother? Can’t shoot him on that basis alone.
2. You must be reasonably afraid. Knives can be just as deadly as guns, even more so in some cases. But you can’t simply shoot someone because they are holding a knife. Threatening you with the knife, yes. Waving it around like a madmen, yes. Simply holding it in their hand, no. Even if you have reason to believe they are a son of a bitch and not a good person. If a reasonable and prudent person would not perceive a threat, then the grand jury will not agree that you had a reason to be fearful.
3. You must prove that you were in iminent danger. If someone is in an aggressive stance and is yelling and screaming and saying they’re going to do some nasty stuff to you, you have reason to be afraid. What you should not do immediately is pull your gun out and shoot them. You should prepare to do so, if you have to, but what you should really do is say something like, “please don’t do that,” or “leave me alone,” or “don’t come near me.” Those are examples of force. Then, if they procede to come at you, you are justified in shooting them, because they constitute iminent danger.
All in all, the class was ok. I wouldn’t recommend this specific class if you want a concise and organized dissemination of the material. I’ve heard that it is hard to meet the 10 hour minimum, that the instructors have to take breaks or slow down or else class ends too early. This was the opposite, and, although there were some good and funny anecdotes and wisecracks along with the out-of-the-way showboating of testosterone, it took 15 freaking hours! My back was killing me!
Some people just don’t know when to keep their mouths shut. I didn’t have to put anyone in their place until the shoot test. The sun had completely set by the time I shot, and it was quickly approaching dark from dusk. The 3 yd shots are a joke, and I wasn’t worried about them so much. I noticed that I shot a little high on the double-taps, but I was still in the kill zone and maximum point range (5 points). Since I was shooting 9mm and it was not easy to see where I was hitting at more than 3 yards, and because I was shooting consistantly, I decided not to adjust my aim, which would’ve been useless because there was no way I’d be able to tell if I overadjusted at 7 yds in the dark. And then…
“Just so you know, you’re hitting a little bit high,” says the guy behind me.
Holy inappropriate comments, batman!
Keeping my Sig pointed down range, I turned around and gave him my death glare and the hand.
“Yeah, I know. But he’s dead,” I said, nodding at my target.
I know I can come off as a little defensive of the range, but really, I just don’t like people talking to me when I’m shooting. And hel-lo, didn’t we spend a couple hours learning that it is a bad idea to talk while shooting? F*****! I was pissed about that. What makes me pissed still is that I felt bitchy for the response I gave because he was probably trying to be gentlemanly. Still, it was totally inappropriate for a CHL shoot test, and he should’ve known better. I told ya I can hold my own with the Texans 
The last thing we did was get our pictures for the permit, and I had my final opportunity to mess with boys.
“What, no primping,” asked Tom, when I went up for my picture. I gave him a nasty mug for that one, then smiled my disney princess smile.
“Did you do modeling?”
“Actually, I have done some modeling.”
“You look like you have. Is that what you’re doing in Texas?”
“No, but it’s one reason why I’m in your CHL class.”
By the end of the day, the presense of shoothouse barbie had been made known, and not just because I had painted my nails a shade of pink that would’ve made Mattel cringe, or because I wore my bullet flower in my hair (which no one picked up on!)
